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Darrin Baird

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Aug 25 2014

Lots of Practice: 87-Year-Old Grandma the Gymnast

Seen here pulling off an amazing feat of strength that I have never and will never be able to match is Johanna Quaas. Her and her 87 years hold the Guinness World Record for being the oldest practicing gymnast. When I’m 87 years old I doubt I’ll be able to do anything with the ease …

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Aug 22 2014

Clamps

If you’ve ever wondered why C is the only letter that gets its own clamp then you have far too much free time on your hands. If you’ve ever wondered what legal retributions came against the number 7 after seven eight nine then you have an entirely unique set of life issues. However I did …

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Aug 19 2014

I Knew It: The Earth Used to be Covered in Dragon

Finally science has caught up with reality and admitted that the world used to be inhabited by dragons. I’ve known this day was coming and I’m seriously surprised it didn’t come years ago. So here’s the deal: According to a new study published recently in ZooKeys, the Earth used to be ruled by Azhdarchidan pterosaurs–massive, toothless winged creatures …

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Aug 14 2014

Roadside Attraction: Salmon Cannon

So salmon, amiright? They’re crazy animals. Ever year they swim up a river and do their thing to make new little salmon. Sounds pretty simple right, a little swim up stream with the reward of sexy-time? I suppose it could be, up until they hit a dam or something that has been built up in …

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Aug 12 2014

Making Music from Bad Plumbing

You know when you’re using the bathroom at a friend’s house and your worst fear is that something should go wrong. You manage to flush the toilet without flooding the place but then you go to wash your hands and when you turn on the faucet it does that banshee scream and starts coughing and …

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Aug 11 2014

Man Sets House on Fire While Trying to Kill a Spider

You know how when you see a spider in your house you want nothing more than to just burn the place down and start over again in a new city. Especially when it’s one of those gigantic brown beggars that like to wait for you every morning in the bathtub and then they look all …

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Aug 06 2014

Like: Steampunk Disney Characters

Who else loves everything Steampunk? Raise your hand. For all of those raising your hand you are invited to my house on Monday for pizza. From this group who of you loves when people draw Disney characters in other costumes? You’re allowed to bring your favorite side to the pizza party because I know you’re …

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Jul 30 2014

Would Drive to Work: New Israeli Zombie Apocalypse Vehicle

When the Zombie Apocalypse hits what vehicle do you want to be driving? I know, some people suggest a bicycle is the best way to go but those people will be zombies by the time the outbreak makes it to my town anyhow so I have zero shits to give about what they say anyhow. …

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Jul 29 2014

Wracked By Guilt: Dog Apologizes for Stealing Baby’s Toy

This is Charlie the dog and the offspring of his humans. Earlier in the day Charlie tested the theory about stealing from babies. Unfortunately it wasn’t as easy to live with as he had originally expected. Feeling guilt burn straight through his soul Charlie then spends the rest fo the day trying to atone for …

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Jul 28 2014

Did not Want: 8-Bit Characters Made Real

Why must the internet spend all of it’s time ruining what is left of my childhood? Everywhere I look there is something new that destroys my blissful ignorance of the world around me. 8-bit characters of old are quaint and even cute when viewed through our modern eyes, but what if we could turn those …

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