Category Archive: For Sale

Jun 11 2014

Would Eat: Spam Filled Doughnuts

Unlike most Americans spam doesn’t frighten me. I don’t eat it often but when I do I’m rarely disappointed. For that reason I was happy to see these spam-filled doughnuts. Not only are they doughnuts filled with spam, they are also deep-fried. And that’s just great. John Clarkson, owner of Mister Eaters fish and chips …

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Jun 09 2014

Incredible: Drinkable Sunscreen

Harmonized H2O who makes all sorts of supplements and miracle treatments has come out with a product that they claim to be an effective drinkable sunscreen and tanning enhancer. You’re supposed to just drink a cap full an hour before you head out into the sun and every 4 hours after that. You can head …

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Jun 06 2014

Want: Laser-Guided Tactical Neck Tie

Still can’t think of what to get dad for Father’s Day? How about a laser-guided tactical neck tie? He’ll love it. He may even put you back in the will, but I’m not making any promises after what you did. It’s a good thing he didn’t just beat you to death right then and there. …

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Jun 03 2014

Available in the Used Meat Department: Tauntaun Butcher Chart

When you’re stuck on the ice planet Hoth and you have to survive a frozen night outside of the base what do you do? Obviously you slice open your recently deceased tauntaun and climb inside. What about if you’re just craving a nice steak and the last of the space cows escaped from the corral? …

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May 19 2014

Want: Car that Inspired Bond to Drive and Aston Martin Up for Sale

Name the five coolest makes of cars you can. Did you include Aston Martin? If not you can just get out right now because you’re views on life are skewed. Did you seriously include Morgan? I’ll admit they look nice but seriously, they’re made of wood. The Aston Martin DB 2/4, which is believed to …

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May 15 2014

Cute but Deadly: Panda Dogs

Pet shop owner Hsin Ch’en has taken to dying his Chow puppies to look like giant pandas. As expected he can not keep up with the demand for his false-colored puppies. “There are no chemicals or cruelty involved,” Ch’en said. “But the price of the dog does rise significantly because of the amount of grooming …

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Apr 29 2014

Oxymoron: Upscale Taco Bell

You know what an oxymoron is right? Good, because I’m not about to explain it. Taco Bell CEO Greg Creed told Restaurant News that the new chain targets wealthier customers who are “edgy in how they live their lives but not necessarily in how they eat.” Diners will be able to nosh on the “One …

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Apr 28 2014

Nicely Done: Skull Violins

Stratton Violins is in the business of making the violin a “cool” instrument for today’s youth and death metal bands to take up. Not sure how that’s going but their product is pretty awesome. They make Skull Violins. Instead of using real skulls which probably wouldn’t sound as good they make their violins from pure …

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Apr 21 2014

Want: Tiny Robotic Printer

If you’ve ever had to set up your own or help anyone else with theirs you know that printers are the absolute worst technology on the planet. Everything about them is horrible. The ink is expensive, the software either doesn’t work or hijacks your whole computer, they constantly get paper jams because their paper tray …

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Apr 08 2014

Weren’t They Always: New Scratch-n-Sniff Jeans

How long is it okay to wear a pair of jeans without washing them? I think a week is about right. It takes two days for them to loosen up after a washing so they are actually wearable and then can usually last about 5 more days until they are too dirty to pass off …

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