Category: Technology

Feb 19 2015

Apple is Teaching iPhones to Roll Over

It’s been a while amiright? Yeah, sorry about that. Life you know. Anyway… Some time ago Apple applied for a patent to help their iPhones to “fall like a cat.” I know what you’re thinking, well no I don’t but here’s what I’m thinking, why would you want your phone to flail about and scratch …

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Jun 05 2014

Funny ‘cuz it’s True: How Apply Fanboys React to New Product Announcements

We’ve all had to sit too close to Apple fanboys at some point so we all know how uncomfortable it is. You can feel yourself getting dumber the longer you are within their proximity. And it hurts, it physically hurts, doesn’t it? Being in the room with an Apple fanboy is more detrimental to mental …

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May 22 2014

Investment Company Elevates a Robot Board Member

Recently a Hong Kong-based investment company, Deep Knowledge Ventures, added a new board member. Usually this kind of news is nothing that anyone anywhere would ever care about. Ever. But in this case we do care because we can mark the date in the history of the downfall of the human species. “Why?” I’ll tell …

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May 16 2014

hlp Im bn murdered: You can now Text 911

Good news for those people who are deaf or being held hostage by a masked man with Volcan-like hearing. You can now text 911 for help. Unfortunately this only applies to some states and some counties within those states right now. The ones with the extra man power and the call center personnel who are …

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May 14 2014

Want: Tiny Scanner Tells you What Things are Made of

How handy would it be if you could scan an avocado with your key fob and be told whether it’s ripe or not? Or what if you could beep that mystery container in the back of the fridge to find out what the hell it used to be. Or, more importantly if the container is …

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May 14 2014

Multiple Choice: Who Does Your Automatic Car Hit

Picture this, you’re driving along in your robotic car and the front tire blows. The first thing you do is spill coffee on yourself and drop the Game Boy you’ve been playing with and now you’re probably going to die. You just knew it was going to be one of those days. Whether or not …

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May 06 2014

Hipsters Rejoice: Sony Crams 3700 Blu-Rays on a Cassette Tape

Don’t you love repurchasing your movie library every couple of years as a new format comes out? Isn’t it great to have 6 different versions of the same movie, all of which you have to use a different machine to play? Then when you try to hook them all up you find that your TV …

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Apr 29 2014

Living with Lag: Oculus Rift’s New Experiment

An unfortunate fact of life for many of us living in rural areas is that the Internet, and therefore life, is sometimes plagued with a lot of lag. For this reason I’ve never been big on playing online multiplayer games. Yes, a whole huge population of gamers has never known the ass stomping I deal …

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Apr 28 2014

Funny: Siri Tells it how it is

You know me, I’m not an Apple fan. I despise Mac products and the douche bags people become when they switch to them. I think it’s more the latter than the former that bugs me. Stupid iSheep. This particular iSheep is pretty funny though. YouTuber Red 6 created a video of himself and Siri being …

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Apr 23 2014

The End is Nearing: Micro-Robots are Building Stuff Now

This is one on many tiny robots bent on taking over the world. Seeing as how they are smaller than the tip of your finger you might be tempted to disbelieve that they are a real threat. But let me remind you of that ant hill you laid in last summer when you were trying …

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