Do Not Want: McDonald’s New Mascot will Eat your Soul

HappyThis is Happy, the newest McDonald’s mascot, and he is happy to see that you’re here. He’s also not impressed that you brought him a red-head as a sacrifice though. What good does a ginger do for a soul-hungry fast food mascot?

According to the company, the character, which was originally introduced in France in 2009 and unveiled stateside on Monday, is supposed to bring “fun and excitement” to kids’ meals and be an ambassador for balanced and wholesome eating.

In the statement above “fun and excitement” is that feeling you get when you get your pant leg caught on a bolt in the play place and you spend 25 minutes hanging upside down until they finally find an adult tall enough to reach you.