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Jun 03 2014

Fatality: 7-Year-Old Black Belt

blacklbeltUntil I saw this video I’ve never had any fear that any number of first graders posed me any real threat. Now I see the error in my hubris. If 7-year-old Mahiro came after me in a dark alley or a well-lit gymnasium I’m pretty sure she could tear out my still beating heart, show it to me, and then laugh as she fed it to her pet kitty.

You see, Mahiro is a black belt. I can’t identify the particular martial art that she’s practicing, because I can’t tell the difference, but she’ll use it to kick your face right off.

When most dads want to intimidate their daughters date they sit on the porch and clean their shotgun. In Mahiro’s family it works differently. When some punk kid comes to take her older sister out Mahiro’s mom sits on the porch and brushes the hair of her little 45 pound murder machine.

Hit the jump for the video.

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