Dapper, I can be dapper.

While trying to better myself and become more of a man’s man in the manliest way possible. I found instructions on making the perfect Dopp kit. If you don’t know what a dopp kit is, ask your grandpa. If he’s not immediately available just know that a dopp kit is a toiletry travel-bag. It’s one of those things all men who travel should have. Since the wife’s bugging me to take a vacation it looks like I might be one of those men.

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After you have your bag, it’s time to fill it up with the stuff you need to keep you well groomed while traveling. Most of things we suggest are common sense, others you might not have thought of, but will be happy to have on hand during your adventures.

    Travel bottle of shampoo
Bar of your favorite soap
Deodorant
Toothbrush, Toothpaste, Floss
Shaving supplies: razor, brush, and cream
Nail clippers
Lip Balm
Band Aids
Safety Pins
Aspirin or Tylenol
Lint Roller
$20 bill
Extra pair of contact lenses

Since this is an Art of Manliness article of course they want you to carry “Shaving Supplies” I just scrape my scraggly whiskers off with a smooth river rock. How’s that for manly? I thought I was doing pretty well in my preparation until I came across the $20 bill. I laughed aloud and wept on the inside not having two $10s to rub together. Maybe a vacation is out of the question.

 

C-C-C-C-Combo Breaker!

In recent messed up and crazy news, a man literally shot himself in the face with his harpoon gun and lived. No joke. I’ve sat here trying to figure out how to type that. He seriously shot himself in the head. Bruno Barcellos de Souza Coutinho was out on his boat when his loaded harpoon gun got away from him, turned around, pulled its own trigger, and got the most crazy headshot in history. Keep reading, this story gets better, trust me.

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Worst Job To Be A Temp For: Barcoding Ants

Yes, you read that right. A research group, that obviously has gotten way too bored, came up with the grand idea to barcode ants. Who needs cancer research anyway? I’ve always thought that studying little ants was fun, but I did it generally with a magnifying glass. I want to know how these little critters get all over the place. I also would like to know how they ended up in my cereal that one time. I only realized after my cereal was gone and ants were floating in my milk.

ants

 

Read more after the jump.

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So I’m moving. To a mansion.

Because we all love lists and pictures, I stumbled across this list of abandoned mansions from around the world. I’m thinking of testing out my squatting and survival skills by claiming a couple as my own and moving in, with my pet dragons, so hands off. On a side note, I’ll be taking applications for princesses to keep in the highest room of the tallest tower.

I’m sure every last room of each of these buildings is haunted, but I’ll just stop off on my way and pick up a hooded snuggy so I can live in a perpetual state of hiding under the covers to keep me safe. Eventually the haunts and I will reach a common ground and we’ll get along but until then I’ll be putting the Ghostbuster’s kids through college.

Hit the jump for more of my future residences.

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Lens Flare, the Satellite

NASA Is getting ready to launch their new satellite that will take pictures of the sun. They call it Interface Region Imaging Spectrograph or IRIS, I know clever huh? It’s not scheduled to launch until at least late May of this year but I can wait.

The IRIS satellite will improve our understanding of how heat and energy move through the deepest levels of the sun’s atmosphere, thereby increasing our ability to forecast space weather. On launch day, deployment of the Pegasus from Orbital’s L-1011 carrier aircraft will occur at a location over the Pacific Ocean about 100 miles northwest of Vandenberg off the central coast of California south of Big Sur.

I see this as a secret plot to get Micheal Bay some more crappy, lens-flare-ridden, washed out shots for his next movie. But at least the guys working on it get to wear cool shades and footy pajamas. That’s always nice.

Hubble is 23? Who knew?

To celebrate it’s 23 birthday today the Hubble telescope decided to do what any other 23 year old would do, take pictures of stuff you’ve already taken pictures of. In this case the subject was the Horsehead nebula that lives in my favorite constellation, Orion. This time around though the Hubble had some help from another space-telescope buddy. So it could come up with a pretty near-infrared picture of the nebula instead of the boring infrared version is can create by itself.

I had no idea that the Hubble was 23 years old. I also have no idea which way the horse in this nebula is facing. That’s a one horse nebula. So punny.

It was bound to happen: Disney Sloth Princesses

Because everyone Disney princesses, and lately the internet has fallen for sloths as well, artist Phillip Light came up with these sloth version of Disney princesses.

Or course it’s an article like this that brings me up to date. I had no idea that the Merida girl from Brave was considered a Disney Princess. I guess you live and you learn, and you watch princess movies alone in the dark.

Hit the jump for the rest of the set.

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To get things movin’: Durex unveils Fundawear

Just the kind of stuff you want to show off at work, so gather you buddies and bosses and pay attention. Today Durex Australia posted a video to their YouTube channel of a couple trying their new line of underwear, ‘Fundawear’. As interesting as it might be to watch it really gave me pause to find out how far behind I live, I mean, Durex has a YouTube channel? Where have I been?

Durex Australia have released footage of a couple trialling their experimental ‘Fundawear’, which, in what they bill as a world first, will allow for touch to be transmitted over the internet.

Boldly stating that their new product is the “future of foreplay”, Durex Australia claim that ‘Fundawear’ allows for “touch to be transferred over the internet.”

I know what you’re thinking, how safe is it to start foreplay on your commute home? Less safe than texting I’ll tell you that right now. That’s especially when you ride the bus home. It scared all the other kids and got me kicked off 8 blocks from home when I started to strip.

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