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Nov 18 2013

Scarier in Real Life: Parents Set up Dinisaur Toys to Fool Children

dino-toys-3Everyone think of the Toy Story movie right now, the first one. Remember Sid? The bad kid who strapped Buzz to a rocket. Where is he now, probably institutionalized somewhere. yeah, I know, he got what was coming to him but just think before the toys scared him into madness he was on his way to becoming the new pizza delivery guy, or gas station attendant, or a serial killer. You know, a good contributing member of society. But now, he lives in a home, with three other guys as crazy as he is, and our tax dollars pay for it all. So good work Woody, you screwed it up again.

Anyway, this story is about a set of parents who are out to make sure their children are never able to move out of their home and become upstanding members of the local community. They’re doing this by finally finishing that basement but more damagingly every November they spend the month setting up the children’s tows during the night to trick the kids into thinking they come to life when the lights go out.

They set up all sorts of scenes, most of them pretty destructive, but I guess it’s stuff that dinosaurs who are cooped up all night might get into. Stuff like eating crayons and making oatmeal messes and spray painting the walls. You know, normal teenage hooligan stuff. The kind of stuff every kid needs to know. I’m just glad they don’t do this in December or the kids would come into the family room one Christmas day to find Santa tied to the tree with a ornament stuffed in his mouth. Give it some time, that may still happen.

What these dinosaurs should be doing it teaching life lessons. Like where one sock from each batch of laundry goes. Or what happens to your keys when you know you just set them on the table. Or who spread Lego blocks across the living room floor.

Hit the jump for the rest of the set.

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