Slated for February 15th in the town of Braunlage, Germany the Naked Sledding World Championships are going to compete with the Olympics. Please say this is going to be televised, I’ll happily take a day out of watching that awful non-sport of ice dancing to watch this.
Held on a bi-annual basis, the Naked Sledding World Championship involves two races – one for men and one for women – the winner of each receiving a prize of €1,000 (£830) – and the prestige of being the best in the world for ballsy displays of bravado on the toboganning front.
Competition for places will be tough. In the last championship, in 2012, from 5,000 entrants, only 30 were selected. And those that were certainly needed to be good sports: a crowd of 25,000 cheered them on as they raced down the mountain and even more are expected for this year’s event.
It doesn’t sound like they are going to let me come compete, I just don’t do well naked. Not that I’m not a perfect specimen of humanity or anything, it’s just that my brilliance tends to outshine those others in the locker room and no one appreciates that.