Want: MacGyver Tool Kit

macgyver-kitCould you escape from a prison camp with nothing more than a rubber band and a horseshoe? I could do it. You know who else could do it? MacGyver. In fact he could do it with just the rubber band and a single nail out of the horse shoe.

In that spirit IFixIt came out with this MacGyver tool kit. They actually call it the Action Hero Toolkit, probably to prevent someone from suing them. I get it.

As you can see it’s basically a $10 Altoids tin, the hacker’s favorite container, crammed with various useless crap that you can use to save yourself from a dire situations, so long as you carry it with you at all times. The kit contains:
Bobby Pin – Pick locks or keep your mullet funky fresh with this heroic hair product.
Strike-Anywhere Match – Seven second campfire.
Rubber Band – Bazinga!
Bubble Gum – Not just for chewing.
Birthday Candle – Suitable for a “Happy Birthday MacGyver” cupcake. Or slow burning fuse.
Paper Clip – TPS reports should be stapled. Bombs should be defused with a paper clip.
Shoelace – Makeshift handcuffs. Makeshift shoe binder.
1ยข Stamp – Cover your laptop webcam to protect yourself from the NSA. Or send a postcard in 1873.
Duct Tape – Exactly as strong as MacGyver’s jawline.
Pocket-Sized Toolbox – Easily carried by any action hero with pockets. Not compatible with superhero tights.

Instead of bothering to buy and carry this around I think I’ll just get a concealed carry permit so I can shoot anyone who tries to kidnap me. Problem confronted and solved.